Weekly ideas to stimulate reflection, inspire new possibilities and encourage new ways of doing and being.
1. Test the water
This week’s word is: Excuse
An excuse is a reason or justification not to do something. The English word excuse comes from the Latin word ‘excusare’ which is made up of two words: the first, ‘ex’ means to be ‘out’ or ‘free from' and the second ‘causa’ means ‘blame’ or ‘accusation’.
What is your definition of excuse and how do you relate to it? Discuss the question here.
2. Experience the initial wave
To broaden your perspective, take few minutes to read the following thoughts and notice what comes up for you.
I.
“An excuse is nothing more than a self-imposed roadblock.” C.C. Chapman
II.
According to a study conducted by OnePoll, the average American makes 2,190 excuses per year to validate their decisions not to do something. The top 5 most common excuses are: 1. I’m too tired 49% 2. I don’t have enough money 48% 3. I don’t have enough time 48% 4. It’s too inconvenient 31% 5. I’m too forgetful 28%.
III.
Psychologists place excuse-making in the self-sabotage category: a behavior we express that hurts our own performance and motivation. It serves as a distraction that prevents individuals from achieving a task or an outcome. Excuse-making originates from a deeper, unconscious desire to protect ourselves against anxiety and shame. Author Susan David explains: ‘It’s natural to seek out explanations for our actions, and sometimes our reason for doing something is completely valid. While an explanation paints a clear picture of a situation for the sake of clarity and insight, explanations can often morph into excuses that justify actions or minimize responsibility. When left unexamined, our excuses can keep us from living into this possibility.’
3. Dive deep
To deepen your awareness and spark new discoveries, I invite you to take few minutes this week to consider the excuses you regularly make and explore the following questions:
What are the underlying beliefs behind these excuses?
What are the unintended consequences and impacts of these excuses?
What would happen if these excuses did not exist?
4. Ride your radiant wave
This week I invite you to find a way, not an excuse. To do this, I encourage you to experiment with the 5 Second Rule, a concept developed by Mel Robbins to encourage individuals to take immediate action on their goals by counting down from five to one and physically moving to disrupt hesitation and excuses. By counting backwards, you shift the gears in your mind by interrupting your default thinking. By focusing on the count down, you distract yourself from your excuses and focus your mind on moving in a new direction. When you physically move instead of stopping to think, your physiology changes and your mind follows.
This week, when you have an instinct to act on a goal or you feel yourself hesitate before doing something, count 5-4-3-2-1 and move towards the action!
Interesting topic. Are excuses used primarily to excuse yourself from situations that you are not interested/comfortable participating in? For instance, one may not want to associate with certain people so we make up white lies or excuses that we’re busy or have something else planned. I have a few friends who will just say ‘nope, not interested’ but because I know and care for them, I can graciously accept their ‘no.’ I think excuses to oneself are mostly due to procrastination or feeling overwhelmed by a task. I’ve gone back to creating job lists to be completed but with steps involved. This allows me to see the big picture but chip away at it and because I’m a visual learner,…